09 August 2006

Happy Half Birthday, Natalie!

Six months ago today, I was walking around the office with a leaking amniotic sac and heading to the hospital by myself, 5cm dilated, while Jim scrambled to wrap up things at work since he knew he wouldn't be back for a few days, as he was about to become a DADDY. You were this helpless little thing that scared the pants off me; I remember trembling in the hospital when the realization hit that we had to take you home and do this on our own, without any nurses to come running at the push of a button. You didn't do much but nurse, and you snorted like a truffle pig when trying to find my nipple. You were rather scawny, with long skinny chicken legs, and we spent so much time together topless, just resting chest to chest, feeling each others warmth and heart beat.

So much has changed in your short life span that you have no clue about; and finally, things are starting to look up. Daddy starts a new job on Monday, and I'll get to stay at home and take care of you like I've always wanted. At last! I'll still be working, just not as much and mostly when you are sleeping (even if that means getting up at 5am to put in a few hours before you wake). We need the money, so it's not going to be all fun and games. There may even be times where you have to holler for a few minutes in your crib because you want out but I need to make a quick important phone call. But hopefully that will change and someday in the future I'll be my own boss and set my own rules. But for now, this is how it has to be, and it's a lot better than me having to leave your sweet self every morning to trudge to work and spend my day sitting in a cublicle.

Six months old, and you are a turning into a vibrant little girl. Everyone who meets you says the same thing: "She's so alert and bright eyed!" You prefer to observe the wild world around you, and then tell us all about it later when you are back in the comfort of your house or your room. But when you are angry/upset/frustrated, you've taken to curling your feet in and rubbing them against your bare legs like an angry little cricket when you cry. It's too funny and makes we want to pick you up and comfort you even more. You can also roll from you back to your tummy, and I burst with pride every single time you do. I can't imagine how proud I will be when I see you walk down the aisle at your high school graduation. You have always been a cuddler, and I cherish those moments when you are quiet, on the verge of drifting off, curled up in my arms making sweet little baby noises to no one in particular. I could spend all day tickling you just to hear you laugh, as it's the best sound by far in the whole wide world. Whatever comes our way, we've bonded as a family through some tough times and I know we can face whatever else God has in store for us.

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